Goodbye 2015

I have mixed emotions as the end of 2015 approaches. Part of me wants to ignore it because many aspects of this year will go into 2016 as well. The other part of me is staring at the chapter of a book that is about to end, but it's a chapter that changed the plot entirely. 

2015 will be forever remembered as the year my world was turned upside down. I have never experienced more pain, sadness, anger, or hopelessness in my life. At the same time I have never been filled with more gratitude, love, peace, acceptance, or hope in my life either. I watched a cherished dream be crushed and the pieces thrown away. But I also was filled with hope as I realized that an even better dream would come true one way or another.

The good news is that even though this year has been the most difficult one of my life up to this point, I end it as a much greater person than I have ever been. I've become closer to my Savior. I've made my relationship even stronger with my Heavenly Father. I know that he is carrying me right now, and that brings me great peace of mind while life is difficult.

2016 is going to be an interesting year. I'm at the point of the book where I'm terrified to turn the page to see what happens next. There are some wonderful things that will happen though.

My daughter will be born. Her coming into this world will be an amazing experience. I will be graduating with my Bachelor's degree, a goal that I've had since I was a child. 

The most important part is that I will be an even better person than I am now. New Years Resolutions never made sense to me but as the new year comes closer I realize that I don't have a specific resolution, but an image of who I want to be. The 2016 version of Kaili is someone I'm quite excited to meet. 

Goodbye 2015. I say it with gratitude. Thank you for making me the person I am today. Thank you for teaching me many valuable lessons. Thank you for showing me the truth.